How it Feels to be 60

First of all, we celebrate our birthdays at the end of a completed year. Turning 60 means that I've just wrapped up my 60th year and I'm now into my 61st year, even though we still call it being 60. Basically, we're all a year older than we think. Sorry.

How I've been feeling as a whole lately. I feel... less solid. Less sure of anything.

I like to think I'm a pretty factually minded person. I like evidence. Numbers. And I try to be honest about what I know, even when that means I risk pissing people off or being attacked and 'put in my place' by someone who can't or won't think.

As a person practising open-mindedness and honesty, I invite new information even that may lead to a change of mind. That would be personal progress. So that part of my life is easy to live.

But another part of my life is the 'what's next?' part. For all the learning and understanding I achieve, I find the question of what it all means, what it's leading to, where we're going, even more obscure.

When I had religious beliefs (and I'm including 'I'm not religious, I'm spiritual'), I had all the answers. At least as far I where I was going. Now I don't have any of that and I'm back to wondering what it all means and where do we go.

The less I distract myself with the internet, music and other activities, the more I wonder. It's not a bad thing.

So yes, as I said' I feel less solid. Like I'm slowly fading. Or, maybe everything around me is fading away.